Writing challenge #6

Roar.

Jace here.

Yeah, yeah, just because I'm writing, you're worried something happened to Clove again.  Well, worry not, anxious mortals.  She just got back from a week at a girls' camp where she was working as a team leader (i.e. as a care-taker/nurse/maid/launderer/slave for about thirty needy, garrulous, yet, according to Clove, "cute" seven to eleven year old female mortals).  Currently, she's understandably a bit sleepy-weepy-thank-heaven-she's-leaving-Jacey-aloney, so, magnanimous benefactor that I am, I thought I might help her out and do a bit of her work while she's got her feet kicked up at the couch.

All is good, friends.

(Back to Clove, guys.  Just as extra reassurance, I've not actually fallen asleep and left my troublesome elf to storm this quadrant of the internet galaxy by himself, despite what he claims.  I just thought it'd be fun to let Jace have a go at writing again.  Really, please don't be concerned; I have a taser right next to me in case if things get out of hand--)

Hey, gimme.
Mine.
My laptop.
Out of my post, mortal.
You promised me I could do your writing challenges from now on, and, if you keep interrupting me, it'll take me until doomsday to finish.

Now back to business.

For your sixth writing challenge, Clove wants you to give her your best, most original pick-up lines and matching anti-pick-up lines, which she will then plagiarize (with your permission, which isn't plagiarism, but, hey) and use in her own writing.  Of course, right now, you might be asking: how in the world was Clove born so uncreative that she can't even come up with her own writing?

Simple.
Negative, dominant-trait breeding.  >:P

Now, let's see.  Terms and conditions.  These pick-up lines and anti-pick-up lines will preferably be ones not found on the internet.  Of course, if you find a really good one via Google that isn't obviously well-known, that'll be fine too.  If you give her one that she likes (i.e. one that is really snarky, mean, and sarcastic) and if she gets your permission to use it, she'll put it in her story and post the scene in which she includes your lines.

Woo.  Big prizes for everyone.

(*sighs*  Clove again.  You're terrible at this, Jace.  I'm not asking for the lines because I can't come up with any on my own.  Trust me, at the ripe old age of sixteen, when people are regularly surprised for whatever reason that - behold and indeed and alas - I'm not actually twenty-one, I've voiced my share of relational stiff-arms.  No, I'm asking because I think everyone in my audience is particularly creative and intellectual, and I want to see what awesomeness we've got out there.  This isn't an obligation; it's a fun chance for my readers to strut their ingenious grey matter a little.)

Ten bucks says no one comments.

(Are you serious?  =.=)

Absolutely.

(>.>  Your loss, buddy.)

Hue hue, well, you heard the harridan.  Help fund the "Jace Has Pocket Money Society" by NOT commenting with your best pick-up line and matching anti-pick-up line!

DON'T write on!
Jace the Trustworthy